Mama Bear

I'm totally going to embarass Ezra one of these days at the playground. He's too young to notice/care now, but as he gets older it's bound to happen. I feel helpless to the ferociousness that takes over when older kids "wrong" him at the park. Maybe I should be more compassionate towards them. Maybe I should take the long view and realize that I will get my comeuppance when Ezra is one of the older kids and acts similarly towards a younger child (I doubt it, but I'm willing to entertain the possiblity). Maybe I should "let them work it out for themselves" (although I don't know how this works when Ezra is 21 months old and the "offender" is 5). In any case, I don't do any of these things. I feel angry and I usually say things. Things like: You need to move out of the way (to the 7-year old boy who repeatedly jumped onto the bottom of the slide every time Ezra was coming down) and Well, I don't see her here now, so he's going to go in it (to the 5 year-old girl who said the swing was saved for her best friend) and He seems to be doing just fine (to the same girl when she continued to say that the swing wasn't for babies). Sometimes, I want to say something to the kids' parents, as they obliviously (or maybe not obliviously, maybe they subscribe to the "let them work it themselves" school of thought) talk to their friends or chat on their cellphones.

I did say something to a girl's mother yesterday. However, this was in appreciation. The playground was packed as there had just been a concert and Ezra was waiting at the top of the slide. Older kids kept cutting in front of him one after the other and he was getting upset and nervous. He was calling for me. I said, "Come down the steps, sweetie, it's too crowded here right now." A girl standing behind him said, "He can go now," as she kind of put out her arms and blocked the other kids from diving in front of him. This small action meant the world to me. He smiled and slid down. Then she came down. I thanked her and told her that I really appreciated what she'd done and then Ezra and I went over to her mom and told her what her what her daughter had done. The mother beamed, said to her daughter, "Did you hear that?" and gave her a big hug. So, I guess, the flip side of my anger at injustice is the appreciation of kindness.

You just don't want to get on my bad side at the park.

Comments

[Sarah]

I am the complete opposite. I pretty much just stand back and let Jack do his own thing. (Although I don't talk on the phone or anything, I do stand where ever he is.) I think I spent way too many years teaching, and I am burnt out on the telling kids what to do thing. Anyway, the point is, I think it all evens out in the end. Ezra is more likely to embarrassed by your hair! LOL

[laura]

We've encountered some really great kids like that as well, ones who ask Madeline if she's alright when she trips, or help her down from the see-saw at the park. I don't think that there is anything more important than letting those kids know that you appreciate what they've done right. One day, I hope that I get the same comments about Madeline's acts of compassion.

[Diana]

I think it's *huge* when non-related adults compliment kids for being sweet and looking out for others. Kudos to you, mama!